taahko:

[to the tune of uptown girl] im that bitch…catch me dying in a roadside ditch

mothurs:

so there i am, depression all over my titties 

baelor:

i hate making tea cuz i feel bad for throwing out the teabag. i’m always like i should eat this

hexpress:

phsfg:

phsfg:

The weirdest thing I’ve learned while working for pest control is that snails love rat poison and will actively eat it but hate seseme seeds

I should add that rat poison has NO effect on snails, and they just get super fat cause they gourge themselves in boxes of rat poison

absolute units

earthdad:

me: whats up?

some alternative girl with anime character icon: just watering my plants and looking at my cactus they are gentle and smol like me

me:

kingwildex:

habeesha:

please keep me in your prayers guys, nothing happened i just want a fatter ass😔

Originally posted by bynnan

997:

mgmt: CONTROL YOURSELF TAKE ONLY WHAT YOU NEED FROM ME

my 2008 self: 

cyberpetty:

cyberpetty:

number 1

number 2

number 3

number 4 and 5

daisenseiben:

tripleclown:

this is honestly one of my all tim favorite hsitorical pictures because of the three dudes that are just LOSING it in the front

A good sax solo be like that.